God Really Does Care For You

We all worry. Some of us worry more than others. I know I am guilty of worrying too much. I pretty much worry about everything there is to worry about, and after that I worry that maybe I forgot to worry about something else.

I have completed my read of "Overcoming Fear, Worry, and Anxiety" by Elyse Fitzpatrick. It was an excellent read and I would like to share what I learned in a couple of different posts.

Since worry is such a struggle for me--although in reading this book I finally understood how fear, worry, and anxiety are all connected--I thought I would start with worry first.

Why Do We Worry? Well...the simple answer is because of sin.

The Lord tells us we don't need to worry in His Word.

I know that you have all read these verses like 40 times. But seriously, take the time to read them again. I'm typing them out so that I read them again as well:

"Don't be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they? And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? And why are you worried about clothing? Observe the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? You of little faith! Do not worry then, saying 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear for clothing?' For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6:25-33

I think one of the frustrating things about worry is how easily I am entrapped in the sin. Elyse Fitzpatrick writes, "Worry is so common that we forget that it's actually a sin." I know I am guilty of that. I read this chapter on worry a few weeks ago and already I am creating a cozy little place in my life for worry to hang out.

I just need to "just say no" to worry!

Here are a couple of other verses that exhort us to not worry:

"Cast your burden upon the Lord" (Psalm 55:22)
"Do not worry about how or what you are to say" (Matthew 10:19)
"Be anxious for nothing" (Philippians 4:6)
"..casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7)

One point that Fitzpatrick made that I took particular comfort in was, "Don't misunderstand: Jesus isn't talking about trying to turn off your brain. He isn't teaching, 'Don't think at all about what you're going to eat, or wear, or your sleeping arrangements,' No what, He's warning us about are those troubling, fearful thoughts that so effortlessly captivate our mind."

I read that sentence a couple of times...."fearful thoughts that so effortlessly captivate our mind." I am so guilty of this. This week's worry is my trip up to Central California for Thanksgiving. I am worrying about every aspect of the drive up there. Will there be traffic? How long is it going to take? Is the baby going to freak out? What if all of these things happen? What if we are late for the meal? What if? What if? What if?

It is tiring being me. I so wish that I could overcome this struggle with worry.

I thought another interesting point that Fitzpatrick made was how amazing our brains are. Our brains are powerful things. "One article states that it is 'reasonable to conclude that the human brain has a raw computational power between 10 to the 13th power and 10 to the 16th power operations per second.'" Basically we are capable of having a million thoughts in one moment! And as Fitzpatrick says, "What's even more astonishing is that the God who created our brain's ability to function in this way has told us to control our thoughts!"

It seems like an insurmountable task. But one thing that I found comforting is that God is exhorting us to control our thoughts, which means it must be POSSIBLE. For God would not want us to labor for something in vain. Will I be able to control all of my thoughts? No. But the knowledge that it is possible was very freeing to an OverThinker like me.

Of course, we need to remember that the only way it is possible to just say no to worry is if we cling to Christ. We must flee to Him. And only Him.

Fitzpatrick references this important verse,

"Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing."
John 15:4-5

We can't overcome our worries without Christ's strength and help.

Fitzpatrick spends some time analyzing where worry comes from and why it is sinful. You will have to read the book to learn more about that!

Just keep in mind that at the end of the day, we have no reason to worry. God takes care of the sparrows and the lilies of the field, He will certainly take care of you.

She closes the chapter with some advice on how to overcome worry. I had forgotten that God's Word provided me with a plan on how to overcome worry.

Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything; tell God your needs and don't forget to thank Him for His answers. If you do this you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus....Fix your thoughts on what is true and good and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely, and dwell on the fine, good things in others. Think about all you can praise God for and be glad about. Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you.
Philippians 4:6-9 (The Living Bible)

I had read these verses many times, but not from the perspective of controlling my thoughts. And man....that was convicting! God wants me to dwell on what is "true and good and right." And I know for a fact that I am not always doing that.

Much like your elementary school teacher talked about "thinking caps," Fitzpatrick encourages us to put on "thought filters."

After we have prayed with thanksgiving (!) about all our concerns, we need to learn (by God's grace of course) to control our thoughts.

"Paul tells us that there are eight filters through which we should judge our thoughts.

Thought Filters, Ask Yourself:

True: Is what I am thinking true about God, particularly His fatherly care for me?

Honorable: Do my thoughts honor God? Do they reflect the knowledge that He is wonderful, kind, loving, wise, and powerful?

Right: Are my thoughts holy, righteous, or just? Are they the kind that the Lord Himself would think?

Pure: Do my thoughts cast doubt on God's goodness or the truth of His promises? Do they elevate my own importance or desire?

Lovely: Do my thoughts flow from a heart filled with tenderness and affection for the Lord? Would my thoughts bring Him pleasure?

Of Good Repute: Are my thoughts of good repute? Are they grounded in faith?

Excellent: Do my thoughts cause me to be fearful, or do they fill my heart with courage and strong commitment to virtuous living?

Praiseworthy: Would the Lord commend my thoughts? Would they bring Him glory?"

Is this quest to no longer worry going to be accomplished overnight? Nope. Paul says in Philippians that we must "practice." We are going to fail. But we need to keep trying. Fitzpatrick points out that God will give us peace in this endeavor.

"The peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus," and "the God of peace will be with you" (Philippians 4:7-9)

Lastly, Fitzpatrick also points out that all of this doesn't mean we are going to be protected and won't have to suffer through any trials or storms. What it does mean is that God will give us the peace and strength we need to endure them.

Are you ready to accept that peace? I know I am! Join me as I say NO to worry and try to control my millions of thoughts.

2-4-6-8 Who Do We Appreciate??

Ahh....I can't seem to keep up with this blog. I have to get better. I really am trying! Everyday, I think about what I want to write...and then I never get to it. Oh well.

I have been reading a FANTASTIC book by Elyse Fitzpatrick, called "Overcoming Fear, Worry, and Anxiety." Sometimes I think she wrote it just for me! I am so thankful for this book. It is teaching me to think in new ways. It is teaching me to have better control of my thoughts (I didn't even know that you could have control of your thoughts...but that is for another post). And all of that is very EXCITING for an over-thinker.

A few weeks ago, I read her thoughts on Appreciation. We all want it. How many times have you been cleaning your kitchen sink, folding laundry, or doing a menial task for someone else and start thinking thoughts like, "why am I doing this?" or "I hate doing this" or "why doesn't so and so appreciate me for doing this?" or my personal favorite, "why doesn't so and so THANK me for doing the task that I am doing right now?" It makes the task you are doing that much more lame when you have those thoughts.

Here are some scriptures/words of wisdom from Elyse Fitzpatrick on the subject:

*God has called me to be a servant, not a queen who is owed adoration or praise. (Luke 22:26)

*I have been commanded to love and appreciate others, not to be love or appreciated (John 13 and 15; 2 Corinthians 2:8)

*Since others have been commanded to love me, I must seek to make their task easy by serving and caring for them (Matthew 22:38-40).

*My desire for the praise of man is just that: a desire. It isn't a need. Everything that I truly need has been given to me in Christ (Luke 12:29-30; 2 Peter 1:2-4).

*I need to be focused more on being thankful for what the Lord and others have done for me (Psalm 28:7)

*I must seek to lay down my life in response to God's lovingkindness (Luke 9:23-24)

*The desire for praise is an avenue for sin that I must guard against (the book of Esther, Matthew 27:18)

*When I believe that I need praise, appreciate, or acceptance from others I become enslaved to their opinions. That slavery will hinder my ability to speak the truth in love to them (John 12:42-43).

I encourage you to read the verses that go along with these statements. Because the verses really seal the deal on this concept.

I never thought about how the need to feel appreciated goes hand in hand with being concerned (or fearing/worrying) what others think of you. And that verse in 2 Peter--God really does supply us with all that we need.

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.

I hope that you are encouraged by these verses. And the next time you are serving someone by taking out the trash, ironing a shirt (uh...i don't iron at all), keeping your part of the bathroom clean--whatever it is you struggle doing with a servant's heart--try to remember some of these thoughts.

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. Psalm 28:7

Weeknight Coq Au Vin

I know...I am a slacker. What can I say? things got busy.

I have not really been interested in chicken thighs and drumsticks....but I finally saw a recipe that looked interesting...so I thought I would try it out.

The results were super fabulous!

Weeknight Coq Au Vin is very easy to make....

potpourri

for the few people that actually check in here every so often, sorry that i have been neglecting even my flavor fridays.

here is something for that:

Black Bean Tomato Soup and Quesadillas

I made this meal again tonight and it was great. I recommend going easy on the chili powder. And you could serve Margaritas if you wanted to get really crazy...or if you are able to drink them.

I also had this revelation that quesadillas are freaking easy to make. Out of all the things I cook, how have I not made these before? It could not be easier. Faster than a grilled cheese sandwich even. Amazing.

**

Transitioning to solid foods with Peter has been more of an adjustment for me than for him I think. I knew the whole adage about how just when you are used to a certain routine the kid changes it up on you. I think I forgot about it....I couldn't quite figure out how his new schedule should look like and I suffered through a couple of frustrating days when I couldn't get it quite right. Thanks to the help of some dear friends that are probably tired of hearing me update them on his status, things are going a lot better.

We're up to 3 meals of solids a day now and he is doing great....I am sure things will change again soon. But for the moment, I am enjoying the steadiness.

**

Have you thought about how great God's forgiveness is? Maybe you haven't thought about it today...or maybe you haven't thought about it for awhile. But His mercies are so wonderful. The fact that He has offered us a way out, that He has provided us with a Savior....I know that it sounds simple and that this is such a basic tenet of Christianity.

But seriously...have you thought about how awesome it is that God forgives us when we fall short? I pray that I can truly appreciate His forgiveness for me some day. I don't think it has quite hit me yet...I have been reading Psalm 51 a lot recently and also listening to a series from Dr. B on the heart. I was reminded last night that God does not delight in sacrifice. He just wants our broken hearts. There is nothing I can bring to Him. Except my brokenness.

...i pray that those that read this will be able to appreciate God's forgiveness....and accept it. for me that is the hardest part I think....

**

very excited that we are going on our first vacation together as a family. it will be a short and sweet trip but much needed. thankful that we have already had some opportunities in the past few months to take baby p on "sleepovers" so I already am confident that he will do pretty well sleeping in another location....

.....that's all i have got for now...will try to re-dedicate myself to keeping this thing more current.

Flavor Friday

It has been a busy week here...I made something new, but I didn't really like how it turned out...so I won't promote it here. I have got a couple of yummy stuff planned out for next week that I am already excited over!

Company is in town for the weekend which means a lot of cooking but I will be making our favorite things so that is fine. I have already posted much of what I am making this weekend...

So, is it lazy of me to confess what my favorite frozen pizza is as of late? You can pick it up at Trader Joe's (sorry to those foreign readers). It is called Pizza Parlano...it is yummy! I make it when we have had a long day and I just don't have time or inclination to do some cooking.

....enjoy your weekend...I hope it is not full of labor...but full of relaxation...

Flavor Friday

little late here but who will notice....this sandwich is awesome....

artichoke bacon chicken salad sandwich

it is easy and you can make it in advance. and for those that don't like rosemary, you can ditch that and it will still taste good.

Flavor Friday

Pesto is great, because it is easy. Mash up a bunch of basil and garlic and you are set. But what about adding pistachios? Pistachios are a beloved nut in our household, so when I came upon this recipe, I knew it was going to be a must. Any excuse to get pistachios into the main entree!

I followed another suggested menu from Cooking Light. It suggested to serve the Fusili with Pistachio Pesto with melon and garlic bread. The melon really complemented the flavors in the pesto. And it took no cooking, which was nice.

It was a nice summer meal....enjoy!

Flavor Friday

I am not sure if this meal tasted so good because it was shared with dear friends, or if it was just freakin awesome.....but seriously. If you have not put sweet potatoes in the oven for 25 minutes at 425 degrees...you are missing out!!

Cooking Light often puts together a suggested menu--so I went with their suggestion this week and the result was a super delicious result....

Spiced Chops with Mango-Mint Salsa
Roasted Sweet Potatoes
Sauteed Baby Spinach

Game Plan
1. While oven preheats: cut potatoes, and coat with spice mixture.
2. While potatoes bake: prepare salsa, cook pork, saute spinach.

Spiced Chops with Mango-Mint Salsa
Allspice and mango bring Caribbean flair to this dish. The salsa, redolent of mint, also packs a bit of heat thanks to a dusting of crushed red pepper. A Jamaican beer, such as Red Stripe, would complement this meal.

TOTAL TIME: 35 MINUTES

Flavor Tip: To tweak the taste of the salsa, use lime juice and rind instead of lemon. Or substitute chopped papaya for the mango, or if you prefer; look for ripe, golden-yellow papaya that yields slightly to finger pressure.

1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground allspice
4 (4oz) boneless center cut loin pork chops, trimmed
cooking spray
1 1/2 cups finely chopped peeled mango
2 tablespoons chopped fresh mint
1/2 teaspoon grated lemon rind
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
2 teaspoons sugar
1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper

1. Combine first 3 ingredients in a small bowl; sprinkle evenly over pork.
2. Heat a large non-stick skillet over medium-high heat. Coat pan with cooking spray. Add pork; cook 4 minutes on each side or until done.
3. Combine mango and remaining 5 ingredients in a medium bowl. Serve with pork. Yield: 4 servings (serving size: 1 pork chop and about 1/3 cup salsa)

Roasted Sweet Potatoes
Cut 2 (8oz) peeled sweet potatoes in half lengthwise; cut each half lengthwise into 6 wedges. Combine sweet potatoes, 1 teaspoon olive oil, 1/2 teaspoon salt, 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin, and 1/8 teaspoon ground red pepper in a bowl; toss gently to coat. Place wedges on a baking sheet, baking at 425 degrees for 25 minutes or till tender.

When I made these, it seemed like 25 minutes was just right--although some of the pieces were a little brown.

Flavor Friday

I don't want to brag about my culinary skills....but do you ever find yourself looking through your recipes, choosing something to make, and then when you are making it think, "wow! this is much easier to make than I remember." I love having that feeling because it makes me feel like I am growing. And who doesn't enjoy growing--except if it is your waist--hee hee.

Anyways, a great stand-by around here is Superfast Salisbury Steak. I don't think I realized until this week how superfast it really is. If you are "young" and do not have relatives from the Mid-West like me, you may not know (I didn't) that salisbury steak is just a fancy way of saying meatloaf.

I served some instant Idahoan mashed potatoes and corn with this. But you could also do some red potatoes and carrots if you wanted.

Guten Appetit

Are You a Shlumpadinka?

So. Ask yourself. Are you a Shlumpadinka?

I don't like to quote Oprah...as it reveals that I am a viewer...but I must say that she really does have something when it comes to this theory..

Basically, if you are guilty of running errands in your pjs or wear your husband's sweats a lot--you qualify.

I started to think about this because I have been watching a lot of "What Not to Wear" on TLC. A lovely little show of 30 minutes where the hosts tear apart women that either are wearing too many cat sweaters or think that neon is still in. Or they fall into my category of "being too busy" to look nice.

I don't know about you, but when I only have to impress my office manager and the 5 month old everyday--the motivation to dress in real clothes is pretty low. I have been challenging myself to try to look a little nicer--so that at least by the time my husband comes home he has a shred of a reason to remember why he married me in the first place.

Today I tried to jazz it up a bit (mainly because my shorts that I had worn all week and t-shirts were all covered in baby spit up). I put on my khaki capris and a nice tank top. Dressing nicely actually helped me feel a little bit better about the day. My co-worker calls it, "dressing for success." She says that even though she works at home, she makes a point of wearing work clothes. She says it makes her feel more like she is "at work." I don't know if she has stopped that since she had a baby herself....

In any case...don't give up on dressing in REAL clothes! (okay, but I think that nursing moms should get some kind of exception though. As soon as I put on a shirt, there is spit up on it. Today was a miracle to go for more than a couple of feedings without a big pile of yuck).

Real clothes really do help your outlook on life for the day.

PS If you have a chance, check out the link on Oprah's page. I think that I match Dawn most closely in what I would wear everyday if I could.

Flavor Friday

Heidi asked for a fish dish...this one tastes good re-heated. And the salad it suggests you make is pretty good too...Herb-Crusted Salmon with Mixed Green Salad. Note that you don't HAVE to use fresh herbs on this. They can be so expensive!

According to OChef.com, you can substitute one TEASPOON of dried herbs for one TABLESPOON for fresh herbs.

I also found this "leftover" recipe.....Fish and Couscous Salad

Enjoy.....

Greater Love Hath No (Wo)man than this....

than (s)he who scrapes away the astroturf from someone else's front steps.

We have a brick entryway to our house that was once covered in astroturf. When we moved in, the majority of it had been scraped off, except for little bits here and there. Today my mom spent a couple of hours scraping off the rest.

Not to be a Debbie Downer to the young moms reading this, but if you think that you are serving your children now....just wait till your kids are grown and have kids of their own. Today, my mom arrived at my house at 8am. She helped give Baby P a bath. Then she did his laundry, then she did our laundry. Then she made our bed. She cleaned up the bath stuff and put it away. She probably started scraping the astroturf about then...but I can't be sure. Then she gave Baby P his bottle. Then she played with Baby P. And then we put him to bed. She helped me get my sandwich ready even though she was starving.

Then she told me this really cool story about how she got to see her very first American friends yesterday. They actually were the ones that picked her up from the airport when she first arrived in 1968.

Then she cleaned up lunch and then she made this beautiful fruit platter with nectarines, apples, and cherries. I should have taken a picture of it, because she arranged the fruit in a way that only a mom can do. I'm sure she did some other stuff after that, only I haven't discovered it yet. Then it was time to feed Baby P again. And then she played with him.

She was such a blessing to me today. I hope that I can be as helpful to my children as she is to me.

borg borg borg

I just found the coolest website: www.ochef.com

Enjoy!

Bomb Scares...It Is Not Going to Be That Way and etc.

Today I survived my first lengthy separation from Baby P. I had to attend the 1st of a 4 day trade show.

You want to know something funny? After all the stressing I was doing about milk production, I FINALLY realized LAST night that today would be the longest time apart from Baby P since he was born. Obviously someone was focusing a ton on milk production. Anyways, it didn't freak me out too much to be apart from him--seeing as I was finally able to come up with enough milk so that I could leave for 12 hours. Yea! I guess the dark beer and Fenugreek really helped things out.

There were actually parts of the day where I thought, "hm. This is kind of nice. I only have to care for myself at the moment." Part of caring for myself involved heading to the car around 1130am to pump (something I was pretty intent on doing since the pediatrician was harping on the importance of the frequency). As I neared the parking garage, I saw 2 police officers standing in front of a lot of yellow tape. The entire parking garage was blocked off.

Seeing as I know more about law enforcement than the average lady, I knew immediately that this was a "perimeter enforcement." Perimeter enforcements are super boring for police officers (unless you are like a certain someone and enjoy standing around; I guess it beats chasing after bad guys). They have to stand for several hours in front of yellow tape and answer questions from vexed people like me asking, "when can I return to my car?" "why is this tape here?" "what do you mean, you are conducting a special investigation?" "is it really going to be 45 minutes or are you just saying that?" "can't I just go to my car and get 1 thing?"

Well..those were all questions I wanted to ask...but didn't because I knew secondhand that it stinks to have that job and have to interact with the public in that manner. I surmised that the "special investigation" was code for a bomb scare and I would have to wait 45 minutes until I could get into my car again. I s l o w l y strolled back to my prison cell..I mean, booth and tried to pull myself together. I was already so concerned about how the day would go...this deviation in schedule was NOT appreciated. Besides, I am not with Baby P today so I shouldn't have to worry about my schedule being up-ended. I guess God had different plans for me. I would like to say that handled the whole thing gracefully...but I didn't. I was frustrated and irritated....just another area for improvement I suppose.

Fortunately, when I went back at 1230 all signs of law enforcement and yellow tape had disappeared. I quickly took care of business.

**
Working at the show today was interesting because I had a chance to reflect back on the last summer show I worked (we do one in the Winter and one in the Summer). This time last year, I was only 8 weeks or so along in my pregnancy. I had not told anyone yet and I remember being exhausted at the show. I was nauseous and extremely tired. I recall eating lunch in a secret place I found at the convention center (I will show you sometime) and at one point laying down on the floor (which was kind of gross), bursting into tears because I was so tired and hormonal. I just wanted to go home and sleep.

Thankfully this time I was more of a normal human....just a human with an excessively huge appetite due to nursing. Hey, it take a lot of food to keep a 19 pounder going. I remember coming home from the show last summer and being discouraged because I was SO tired. How am I going to care for a child when I come home from a show if I am this exhausted?

Turns out that it is not as hard as I thought it would be. I was so excited to see Baby P after the long day, that I was actually looking forward to feeding him more than I usually do. I mention this as an encouragement to the pregnant ladies reading this. If you are anything like me, you might be trying to visualize what it will be like living with your new little one. You run through your day, kind of "working in" what it would be like to have a little someone by your side. And then you get discouraged because the baby isn't even out yet and you can't seem to manage to get the simplest things done.

I realized today that those kinds of visions are not realistic if you are using your current energy level as a yardstick. The fact is, making another human is a pretty tiring process. There is nothing like it, and hopefully you are not crazy like me--making assumptions about the future based on how your pregnant body handles a long work day.

I don't know about you, but I definitely have a lot more energy when I don't have another person growing inside me. Of course....I am sure there will be some day when I have to work a show or something and I am pregnant...and then I will have to return home and take care of Baby P....that is a scenario I haven't had the chance to OVERthink yet.

**
If anyone is still reading at this point...another thing I came away with this week was that I am really grateful for my job (not my motherhood job, my other one). I really love it. I love the work that I do. Not many people can say that. I love that I can work from home, I love most of the people that I work with, and I enjoy my job description. Some time away from Baby P was helpful to remind me of how much I enjoy owning my company.

So...as much as I love what I do...I don't love it so much that I enjoy giving up my Saturdays...tomorrow I must trudge back to the convention center. I hope it goes well...

Flavor Friday

I planned ahead since I knew I was going to be out a lot and I wanted to come home and just eat some leftovers. I hate leftovers....so I made stuff that actually tastes good when it is heated up again.

Here are 2 things I made in advance:

Baked Pasta with Tomatoes, Sausage, and Cheese

and

Chicken Marbella

(I call it Jen's Chicken because she brought it over as one of my meals after I had the baby. You have to like some stuff that some people have a hard time with: capers, olives, and prunes. Yeah. Prunes. I was a little worried about the prunes myself but it turns out the whole combo is pretty tasty).

Here is the recipe:

2 1/2lb whole chicken (cut up) OR you can just use chicken breasts
1 head garlic (5 -6 cloves) chopped
1/4 cup oregano
salt/pepper
1/2 cup red wine vinegar
1/2 cup olive oil
1 cup pitted prunes
1/2 cup spanish green olives
1/2 cup capers (with a little juice)
6 bay leaves
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup white wine
1/4 cup cilantro or italian parsley (optional)

Combine all ingredients (except the last three) in a bowl. Coat the chicken and marinate overnight.

I keep the skin side down and use a 13 x 9 casserole dish. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Sprinkle the brown sugar over the top and pour the white wine around the perimeter of the dish. Bake uncovered for 50 minutes to 1 hour, basting frequently. Garnish with cilantro or parsley. It goes great with couscous.

When cooled, I pour the leftover juice from the pan into a Ziplock with chicken breasts. I freeze and then use for another dinner.

mmm...Dark Beer

You're supposed to do Homer's voice when you read the subject line for today's post.

Of course, after I wrote all of that godly stuff last night today was really challenging. I think or I know I am stressed about work and it has taken a hit on my ability to produce enough milk. I need to be able to attend a snoozefest, I mean, convention this weekend and in order to that there needs to be enough milk here for Baby P to eat....well...my body hasn't been cooperating and I have not been able to store up enough reserves.

I talked to the pediatrician today and she gave me some suggestions. She told me that I need to pump after every feeding. Which is great, because I have a lot of time to sit around and pump. (that is sarcasm). She also suggested I try taking some Fenugreek AND my favorite part of her advice was to drink some dark beer. I will be hitting a Guinness shortly. Of course, it is an Old Wives Tale as to whether or not the dark beer will help increase milk production....but if your doctor is telling you to drink the beer....you drink the beer.

I know that ultimately my baby will be fed. And if I have to use some formula, I have to use some formula. It sure is hard though accepting all of that. Thankfully my pediatrician has a 1 year old and she had just gone through all of this. She was very sympathetic towards my embarassing tears.

So...here's hoping that the dark beer works.

July 15...a good Streams Devotion....and random musings on KP

This is from the devotional that I have been reading, Streams of the Desert. I hope that it brings you as much comfort as it did to me:

It is easy to love Him when the blue is in the sky,
When the summer winds are blowing, and we smell the roses nigh;
There is little effort needed to obey His precious will
When it leads through flower-decked valley, or over sun-kissed hill

It is when the rain is falling, or the mist hangs in the air,
When the road is dark and rugged, and the wind no longer fair,
When the rosy dawn has settled in a shadowland of gray,
That we find it hard to trust Him, and are slower to obey.

It is easy to trust Him when the singing birds have come,
And their canticles are echoed in our heart and in our home;
But 'tis when we miss the music, and the days are dull and drear,
That we need a faith triumphant over every doubt and fear.

And our blessed Lord will give it; what we lack He will supply;
Let us ask in faith believing--on His promises rely;
He will ever be our Leader, whether smooth or rough the way,
And will prove Himself sufficient for the needs of every day.

To trust in spite of the look of being forsaken; to keep crying out into the vast, whence comes no returning voice, and where seems no hearing; to see the machinery of the world pauselessly grinding on as if self-moved, caring for no life, nor shifting a hairbreadth for all entreaty, and yet believe that God is awake and utterly loving; to desire nothing but what comes meant for us from His hand; to wait patiently, ready to die of hunger, fearing only lest faith should fail--such is the victory that overcometh the world, such is faith indeed. George MacDonald

***
Okay, well I just read this again and was convicted again. Like I was this morning. Sometimes I equate conviction with encouragement. :) It is just another symptom of being an Overthinker.

I prayed that I would able to have this faith. Of being able to "desire nothing but what comes meant for us from His hand." I can't imagine doing this, and yet I feel honored that I got to watch KP do this very thing. Since I know I won't acheive it, I feel honored to be able to be so close to someone who can do it. She probably won't admit to it, and she will blab on about how God saw her through her 35+ treatments of radiation and she won't take credit. Which she shouldn't, because God truly did cover her in so much grace and continues to.

All I am saying is I never once saw her break down and say, "it is not fair" or "why me?" or "this sucks." She just endured her trial with patience and a perserverance that I don't think I will ever have. I guess it is really true that God only gives us thet trials that we can endure.

I am not sure how I got onto that topic...I was just going to post the excerpt and then hit the hay. Maybe it was just because KP gave me her speech the other day, summarizing her experience with cancer.

I praise God for His faithfulness, mercy, and lovingkindness to our entire family in protecting her and keeping her with us on earth.

In any case, do you love Him only when the sky is blue? Or do you also trust in Him alone when the day is drear? I will pray for you, that you will (and I will) trust in Him for all things.

Flavor Friday (Late)

Oops.

This one is fancy-shmancy and only works if you are not pregnant...sorry Ladies....

Spinach and Prosciutto Salad

For pregnant ladies....I will post a link to SuperMom--a multivitamin. Honestly, I can't seem to figure out how it is different from other prenatal stuff. Maybe you can?

This Old House

We were in a Bob Vila place over the past couple of weeks and decided it might be a good idea to fix up the backyard. I was pretty excited as I was dreading the summer--it is going to get hotter and I was dreading spending the pretty summer days in a pee and poo filled backyard with doggies and a sweaty baby. Baby P is not ready for the park that is just around the corner, so I had a feeling we would want to take some jaunts out into the backyard every now and again....I unfortunately didn't have the foresight to take some "before" pics so you will have to rely on your memories and trust me when I reiterate it was a pee and poo filled backyard.

We covered the dying grass dirt with bark, painted the concrete gray, the cinderblock brown, and added some plants. I thought I would try my green pinky (I definitely don't have a thumb) at gardening again. I figure what could it hurt considering that I am at home more now while Baby P takes his naps. In between fighting work fires, I sometimes venture out and water the new plants.....

All in all, it was a lot of work. I basically would feed and play with baby and then put on my work clothes (this consisted of some old sweat pants and a shirt I acquired at a Jimmy Kimmel taping that said, "the more I Jimmy, the better I feel"). It is pretty unnerving, trying to get paint off of your hands as fast as possible so you can head back in and feed baby. My husband definitely did the most work. He is pretty detail oriented and I cannot be trusted with a paint brush. So I just did big brush strokes in certain areas and he made everything look pretty.I cannot believe his ability to paint in a straight line. It is crazy!!

We also added a table and chairs. So now we sometimes head outside and sit with the dogs. I have been trying to introduce Baby P to them and vice versa. Both parties are so mellow, it has been rather uneventful. Unless you count my slight expressions of dissatisfaction when the doggies were allowed to lick Baby P's feet, etc. as he sat in Daddy's lap. I was glad he was sitting with Mike and not me. I don't want Baby P to be afraid of the doggies. And my reaction would probably help promote that. I know their saliva is harmless, but it grosses me out....as I know it grosses everyone else out. Except Mike. We also got a second doghouse, so now they have matching doghouses. It seems to tie everything together, don't you think?

Flavor Friday

Not much to say here, other than yummy!!!

Peach Mojitos

Feeding

I was scrolling through some pictures tonight and found these pics from last weekend....I thought it was important that I cover the topic of eating.

I am definitely doing a lot of feeding. Feeding myself and feeding "the bub" (as Tante H refers to Baby P.). It takes a lot of food to keep this kid going. And I find myself being hungry all the time. The "offering" I would leave to the "food gods" as Mike and I have named it has not made an appearance for quite sometime...normally I will leave a little speck of food on my plate. I am not sure why, it just sits there as though it makes me feel like not such a pig for eating everything on my plate. But these days, I have put those piggish concerns to the side...so that I can make room for more food.

*Note, we did notice that the shading on these pictures makes it seem as though I began eating in the evening and didn't finish until the early morning. Not so....this was all accomplished in about 20 minutes...and granted, it is salad so it is not as "filling".....


It is quite an experience to eat almost a whole pizza from Trader Joe's and still not be full. I am looking forward to getting back to my old appetite, but I am not looking forward to saying goodbye to ice cream..sniff sniff. We've developed a nice relationship since about 7 months into my pregnancy. I guess we will have to rekindle the flame the next time I get knocked up.

Flavor Friday

This recipe comes to you courtesy of Routine Mom. Chicken with Parmesan, Garlic, and Herb Crust is delicious. And even better it is pretty easy. And it tastes awesome as leftovers (which is a definite must for me as I am very anti-leftovers). ENJOY.

I am still trying to figure out what to do for Father's Day...yikes!

His Eye is on the Sparrow

Anyone that is interested might want to know that the local Toyota dealership did locate a sparrow (a dead one) in the wheel well-ish area of our car this morning...

Bird Killers

We left for church this morning and spent the first 40 seconds debating what is a proper temperature for the car. Shortly after turning the a/c on, we heard a rattling in the car. We have only had this car for a month or so, so at first I thought, "wow, we got a bum deal." But then the sound really started to flutter, and it sounded as though the car was ALIVE!

I started screaming and frantically and clinging to Mike's arm. There seemed to be something flying around in the engine compartment of our car. I immediately started shutting the air vents to prevent the spread of the avian flu (at this point we decided it was a bird flying around). Meanwhile, Mike pulled over into a church parking lot (not our church) to further assess the situation.

As he approached the front of the car, we heard more fluttering--and it was coming from the passenger side (MY SIDE!!). He quickly instructed me to leave the car--because maybe the bird---was going to fly into the car via the glove compartment and peck my face to death, like in Alfred Hitchcock's movie, The Birds.

We had been sitting in the church parking lot for about 5 minutes and in the midst of our adventure 2 people drove in to attend church. I feel it necessary to mention that neither party decided to come over and help or ask if we needed help. And it was pretty obvious we had a problem, we were sitting there with the hood up, etc. Aren't you supposed to get help at a church? But I digress...

Anyway, the baby and I were sitting outside the car observing my dear husband as he tried to coax the bird out of the engine area of the car. We were no longer hearing fluttering noises and decided that perhaps the bird had died. We discussed the merits of heading to a Jiffy Lube where we could get the car up on a rack and perhaps view the carcass from there. Was it an act of mercy? Or should we be heading to church? We decided to head for church as we would probably end up worrying my mom to death if we didn't show up, etc, etc.

We didn't hear a peep...I mean sound from the poor thing for the rest of the day. We even called AAA and they didn't have any great solutions. All the auto body shops were closed...so we will have to take the car in tomorrow for someone to take a look at.

All of this left me thinking about the poor bird. It surely did not think that this would be the last day of his/her life when he/she made the fateful decision to crawl up into the wheel well of our car. A seemingly safe option turned out to be one of the worst decisions the bird could have made. This made me think a lot about life in general. Are there decisions in my life that seem safe but in reality are the worst ever--even leading to death?

One would hope that I would have the foresight to know which are safe decisions and which are not. But honestly, without God's Word I think I would be lost. I am so thankful that He has provided us with something to go to. And even more, I am thankful that He has blessed us with a Savior. He has blessed us with a Son who has died for our sins.

So...I guess this little birdie...or whatever it is...did not die in vain...it did create some earnest reflection on my part.

...it is tough being an over-thinker.

Flavor Friday

Three Step Taco Salad is awesome. I have made it several times and everyone seems to like it. It is really easy to put together too, which makes it even more exciting. I am not sure that it really takes 3 steps, but whatever.

Flavor Friday

Some of you may not be fans of fish....but we have recently fallen in love with tilapia. It is a very mild tasting fish and really easy to prepare. Our favorite recipe is Tilapia Picatta. I have made it a couple of times now...it also suggests to prepare orzo with tomatoes and parsley as a side dish. It really compliments the meal nicely. Enjoy!

Bless This Child

It is probably because I do this routine every day right now that I found this SNL skit that aired over the weekend particularly HI-LARIOUS.

Mother's Day

It has been a crazy week--but I thought I would take a few moments to jot down my first Mother's Day. It was pretty relaxing. Church, lunch, and then a nap. A perfect Sunday. Mike gave me a nice card and also a really neat frame with 1 picture of me and Baby P and another picture of Baby P's hand in "mine."

I was studying the photo of the hands, and couldn't figure out a polite way to break it to my dear husband that those were not my hands holding Baby P's. All I could think to say was, "whose hands are those?" Fortunately, he was not offended. It was pretty funny. After some elimination, we realized they were Tante H's hands. Still a very lovely present.

Oh yeah...i got to take a bubble bath. Simple pleasures.

Flavor Friday

Last week the winner was Pork Chops Marsala. You have to like mushrooms and marsala to get into this recipe. I really love both so it was quite delicious. I made it easy on myself and made instant Idahoan mashed potatoes and corn as sides. Find a bottle of red to wash it down with and you are set.

Flavor Friday

In homage to Friday Flotsam and Tater Tot Friday, I bring you a substantially less interesting Flavor Friday--my favorite recipe of the week.

Last Saturday we had Marmalade French Toast Casserole. Three cheers to my mother-in-law for helping put it together. It is a Cooking Light recipe, which is kind of funny because it calls for 6 eggs and more butter than I usually see in their stuff. But it is finger-licking good! It is also pretty easy to make.

You have to make it the night before--which is even more fantastic because then you don't have to worry about waking up blindly the next morning and putting it together. The only thing you need to remember is that it takes 50 minutes to bake. I don't really like Orange Marmalade, but I used it anyway because I am a rule follower (I am not sure what number personality that is). Anyway, when I make it again I will probably use Apricot Jam...you can really use any jam you like. And for those that don't like nuts--don't add those obviously. :) I served it with turkey breakfast sausages...and those present were not really into them...but I thought it was yummy!

Enjoy....

too tired to think of a title

Today was quite the juggling act. I had to take care of baby, conduct 2 phone meetings, see the chiropractor, make a sales call, and then make it back in time to feed baby at 430....and then cook a meal for us. It all worked out, but it was pretty mentally draining to switch from role to role in what was sometimes a matter of minutes. Somewhat jarring for the brain to switch gears so rapidly.

At times I felt like I was a superhero, changing costumes (switching from pjs to work gear and vice versa) for the needed task at hand. Except I didn't feel very powerful, just very sleepy.

Somehow I managed to stop in the midst of all that and take a phone call from another "co-worker" (mommy) who needed to vent about the hard night she had with her infant. In the past, I might have ignored the call or taken it at a time that would have worked better for me. But somehow I managed to have a slight bit of perspective that it was important to listen to what she had to say and offer the feeble advice that I have at this stage.

I am again thankful for the balance that Baby P seems to be bringing to my life. I definitely was not expecting that....as for the dueling roles I have going on all day--I know everyday won't be as hectic as this one was...at least for now.

WAHM: Wake Me Up Before You Go Go

Did you know that I am a WAHM? A Work At Home Mom. I must admit, being a closeted George Michael fan, when I found out that was the acronym, I secretly wished it was WHAM. That would be so much cooler!

In any case, I have googled and googled for sites that offer support to fellow WAHMers and could find nothing that related to my specific situation. Thus, besides providing many over thought thoughts here, I will provide any wisdom or tips I may discover on how to work from home and be a fantastic wife and mom. Many of the sites that I found were offering ideas on things that you could do from your house.

I happened to be blessed with a job already, so that didn't really help. And then there was lots of advice on what to do with toddlers when you are working--set up a desk area for themselves in your office or near your office. Make sure your kids understand that you are working, establish phone protocol (meaning explaining to them--DON'T ANSWER THE PHONE). I am thankful that I don't have to start thinking about those things now. God is so gracious in how slowly He moves us from one phase to the next.

So...for those of you that wonder what a WAHM does with an infant...it is a transition of learning how to work in shorter crunches. You become more effective because you are forced to prioritize what is important and what must be done immediately. Nursing the baby provides you with time to think about what has to be done next, or to mull over the work issue of the day and determine the best way to resolve it. And the best part is that when work goes to the crapper, and it always does--you have a nice little wake time with baby to make you smile and laugh and forget about whatever happened. My office manager and I are quite enjoying the distraction.

The big challenge for me is to not feel guilty when he has to spend some time in his bouncy seat as I pound out some emails. I have to remember that he is being entertained and stimulated by his animals....and the floor lamp that he seems to get a charge out of staring at. And the mirror. And whatever else comes his way. Like my office manager's face when she says hello to him enthusiastically.

And I need to remember to feel fortunate that I have the opportunity to work from home and to work with people that understand the importance of my new job...I'd write more, but I am already blowing my work time...and see--you still have the time to "waste time" like you did before by surfing the net and playing dumb games on Facebook.

for those that are keeping track

He slept from 11pm to 6am today. Very exciting.

The Battle for Sleep

It's hard to believe that 3 weeks have past since my last post. The days seem to flow together these days--with the exception from visits and occasional trips out--I don't really remember one day from the other.

Since my last post, Baby P has learned to smile, laugh, coo, and lift his head at a 45 degree angle. I never imagined that a smile could be so breathtaking.

Over here at overanalyzinglife, I have more time than ever to overthink things as I feed the baby. I manage to create issues out of positive things--such as, "do I have an overly perfect baby?" or "should I downplay how great he is as to not make other new moms jealous?"Yes, these are neurotic thoughts....but that is no surprise. With the sleep deprivation, I have turned to watching Friends again. It stops me from dwelling and it is absolutely entertaining. I have watched seasons 5-10--except for season 6 as a neglectful friend still has that--and today I started up season 1. I had to fire it up because of the battle last night.

Baby P went to sleep at 11pm, only to wake up at 2am. Much discussion was had when we "put him down" (I am trying to think of other phrases, because everytime I say that I envision a dog at a pet hospital, and it isn't pretty), as to whether or not he was swaddled tight enough.
At 2am, he confirmed that he was not swaddled tight enough and I went to fix it. I was thankful that he actually went back to sleep.....until 3am.

At 3am, he awoke...again agitated because he was not swaddled tight enough. I finally figured out what was going on with the silly swaddling blanket and then he actually went back to sleep....until 4:30am.

At 4:30am, he awoke...this time I guess he was expecting a little "pick me up" to get him through till 7ish. However, I really want him to start learning how to sleep through the night...so I let him cry. It was not pleasant, but we got through it. After a bit of crying (I won't post the amount of minutes here to avoid judgment), I went in there and gave him his pacifier...which he actually took. That was pretty exciting, as it said to me that he wasn't hungry, he just needed to have his oral fixation satiated (hope that didn't sound too Freudian). So..he dozed..and I stayed up, watching the baby monitor to see when he would wake up. I watched for an hour.

I ended up sleeping from 5:30 to 6:30am...when he awoke, and I took pity on the little man and fed him. He did really well, all things considered (did I mention it was about 75 degrees in our house?). A quick aside--it ended up being a good thing that he was not swaddled tight enough--because it showed me that he can fall back asleep in the middle of the night.

...then I had to have a phone meeting for work at 8:30am. I almost canceled it, but I decided to suck it up and do it anyway. It wasn't so bad. And thankfully, Mike had today off so I was able to sleep a little bit more during the day.

I hope tonight goes better.

It was my intention to write this post with a military theme (hence the title). To make Baby P a "Private P" and myself the Sgt. or whatever...but my brain can't be that creative at the moment to carry it out. So I will just mention the burst of creativity to the reader and hope it is appreciated.

Problem-Solving

My friend told me today that I could call her back and "troubleshoot" some more ideas on how to handle a cranky and fussy Baby P if I wanted. That got me thinking that my new job is quite similar to my other one. With the job I get paid $ for, I have to solve problems everyday. They mostly involve placating customers or researching how an order could have gotten messed up.

One of my sister-in-laws told me that working and managing others was good training for motherhood. I never really believed her until lately....today I worked on placating Baby P and researching how or why he was messed up. Of course, the sleep deprivation and my laryngitis (yes....fun times here) didn't help things and I don't think I have reached any solid conclusions...other than he is just having a tough day. Oh well. There have been plenty of work problems that never reached solid conclusions either.

Tummy Time

Well, it is not a perfectly framed picture, but you get the idea. I was quite nervous for some reason to start this practice of "Tummy Time." For some reason I thought that he would hate it. And he did pretty well for about 10 minutes. I was shooting for 5. Is it possible for a 3 week old person to teach a 30 year old something?
I guess I thought the whole thing was going to be a more complex endeavor than it turned out to be. I am hoping for more of those moments and not vice versa. :)

Babymoon?

Someone recently sent me an e-mail with the advice to "enjoy your babymoon." I had never heard this phrase before. Have you? Although I decided it was definitely one of the most cheesy phrases I have ever heard--it did cause me to stop and reflect on how nice these past 2 weeks of motherhood have been.

I am so thankful that the Lord has been so merciful to me thus far in terms of any kind of postpartum depression. I have had some tough days for sure, but nothing like what I thought it was going to be like. I am really grateful to have an understanding company that will allow me to take some much needed time off to recover from surgery and to just enjoy being a mom.

So...I may not ever wish someone a happy babymoon due to the cheese factor--but I might be thinking it....

DINK Woman Walking and other musings

I felt like Sean Penn in the movie, "Dead Man Walking," except I wasn't headed to a lethal injection.

I was headed to a c-section. For whatever reason, the hospital staff makes you walk to your surgery. I found that funny, as they insist you ride out of the hospital in a wheelchair. I was told at 12 noon on March 5th that I would be needing a c-section, so I had 5 hours to sit and think about my last few moments as a DINK (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DINKY).

When my sister and I arrived at the hospital room, we flicked on the television. She began to channel surf--but the first channel we came to had Little House on the Prairie. A staple in my television viewing, I insisted no further surfing was necessary--this was the channel to view. As it turned out, the plot line centered on Mary Ingalls giving birth. My sister and I found this pretty entertaining. Mary's water broke and she summoned Adam to get a doctor. 2 minutes later they cut to her holding the baby. They didn't even have the labor scenes....maybe those were not allowed in the 70's....

It was strange to sit there and know that there was a known time-line to this big transition in my life. I had not expected to know the "day and hour." I had been prepared for a natural birth and thought that it would happen at any moment. But, God is perfect and His timing is perfect. And so, as 5 o'clock neared, I tried to embrace the last moments of my old self-centered life and looked forward to the new (who are we kidding, the new life will still involves self-centeredness, but there is a huge chunk of myself that will be dedicated to another person).

I trudged into the surgery room, where they make you lie down on a table very similar to the one that Sean Penn spreads his arms on in the movie (at least that is how my dramatic mind remembers it). Your arms are spread wide, the blue sheet comes up, and the doctors go to work.


It feels strange as the drugs do their thing and you try to remain as alert as possible so that you can try to enjoy as much as possible the arrival of the baby. Looking back on the experience, this was the hardest part for me. My hands were numb so when they put our son on my chest, I couldn't feel his body. I do remember thinking, "he is cute." I am not sure what I was expecting--I just remember thinking that he was pretty good looking for a newborn. I wonder if all moms think this?


I watched my husband and my mom look at him and take pictures. And then they whisked him away to give baby P a bath and the other stuff.

It is great to be out of the hospital now and transition into our new phase of life. Baby P is the model baby thus far. He cries, sleeps, and eats when he is supposed to. We are so blessed. I don't deserve such a perfect baby. I am so thankful for God's protective hand on Baby P in the womb.

We have been having a great time studying God's handiwork. M was very excited to see that their hands had the same unusual line on their palms.

I'm already enjoyed my new job even more than I could have imagined. It can be challenging, but I am finally understanding everyone's comments about parenthood.

I feel honored to be Baby P's mother and I hope that I can do all that God has called me to do in raising him.

Speaking of which, today we baptized him at church. It was a wonderful and energy-depleting day all rolled into one. I was so nervous as to how things would go--the feedings, the changing, getting into and out of the car. I tried to enjoy the actual event as much as possible.

It was also really nice to have some of the same people that were at our wedding attend the baptism. They are all such special friends to us.

So, I will try to be more faithful in posting.